A Rose by Any other name just isn't Rosie

Dear Diary,
    Well, I am finally in my "real" home!  All those months with my foster mom had been great, but it was time to move on.  My new mom is a wonderful person and will suit my needs nicely.  I can see that it should not take long to get this house in proper running order.  First order of business: I plan to give any and/or all the humans who come into my yard the opportunity to pull one of the balls from under the house out for me.  I will then display them tastefully about the yard, ready for immediate use.  Next I will set up my perimeters, using the current fencing as a guide.  This will aid me in defending my property from the numerous "attack deer" that "dangerously" roam just outside the fencing.   The occasional bark should be enough to remind them to keep their distance.   The house, however, may be more of a challenge then initially predicted.   After careful inspection of the pantry one night, I found a renegade 1 pound bag of pasta that needed to be taught a lesson.  After fully consuming it, I noticed a packet of taco mix that was plainly out of order.  I then taught it a proper lesson as well.  The pasta was fine, but the taco mix gave me a little back talk the next day.  I was not aware of it, but mom said I was smelling up the house.  The next night while on my rounds, I noticed that the pantry door was closed.  I am not sure what to do about that, so I move on to the trash bin.  There was a dirty plastic cake pan.  No one should put something dirty in the trash.  I then had to take it out and clean it properly.  Mom then placed it back, impressed with the gleaming container.  The only problem with the trash now is that its often gone before
I can inspect it.  Dear diary, thanks for listening.  I am sure everything will be as I deem proper shortly.                                    

Rosie


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